finding resolution

although i left asia 2+ weeks ago its early this morning on my last day in seattle that my fall travel escapade comes to a close. in a few hours i will be back in chicago surreally repeating my pre-asia routine. with precious little time left, im glad to be looped up on booze even as it exacerbates my persistent cough. why am i drunk you ask? its thanks to a debaucherous night just completed with jon and kimi that started slow but whose finale was ripped and roaring.

kimi and i worked together in mavins early days. jon was an intern and through him we met jpo. the four of us formed an uncommon bond we coined the xbox to symbolize our electric connections to each other and to our collective (think of a box with an x in the middle connecting its corners rather than a microsoft game console). they were heady times. i hadnt thought it would appear in that form but the xbox finally granted pants his posse, if only for a hot second. unfortunately (inevitably?) we were immature and self involved. we confused boundaries of friendship, romance and lust. the xbox proved too volatile and it combusted in a protracted mess of hurted feelings, egos and relationships.

its been a long road back and although the xbox is forever dead, tonight felt like the successful culmination of slow and steady reconciliation. along the way each of us got some of the explicit and implied 'im sorrys' we needed but we also let some of the yucky energy go thereby demonstrating the benefit of time and maturity. all of us are in the midst of dynamic life transitions. kimi got married, jon is moving to germany with his man, jpo is in japan caring for her mother and im, well... doing my thing. in short order we will find ourselves in four different time zones or continents so its fitting that we make our peace.

in this season of resolutions i feel so fresh and so clean to have this debacle resolved. sure there will always be regrets even tho i know it couldnt have transpired differently. but with judith bjini symposiums (jons alter ego) and pride 2007 reunions in the works the future bodes us well. when i arrive back in chicago tomorrow im inspired to revisit a list of things old and new to work on. new years resolutions are good in theory even if they arent ultimately fulfilled. theres always value in seeing previous priorities and if/how/why they were met or ignored.