ultimately writing is embarrassing

i was looking through one of the boxes i had mailed here from seattle and found a thick manila folder labeled 'book'. inside was a curious mix of papers that had inspired an earlier attempt to draft a book proposal for an interested literary agent and publisher. 3 years later im contemplating trying again, but reading over the embarrassing poetry and proposal narrative makes me apprehensive.

plans change: europe?!

since moving to seoul this spring has become a question of when not if, ive been trying to sketch out a coherent itinerary for my last months stateside. in addition to some west indian sun next month, im juggling modest work obligations and a wedding in nyc, a long-time-no-see weekend with my seoul sister in atl, and i should visit mommy in seattle before leaving the hemisphere. danggit id also like to go to o'ahu if i can use miles and score free diggs. no surprise it all comes down to time and money.

stop the insanity! this morning my travel buddy krissy called to confirm that she is attending a paris wedding in early may. hmmm... im going to research some options. if anyone has european sightseeing recommendations, available accommodations, or wants to rendezvous/tag along, please let me know!

the week without distractions

according to a formula by cardiff university psychologist cliff arnall, the monday of the last full week of january is the years most depressing day. 'blue monday,' as he calls today, is caused by the combination of xmas debt, yucky weather and new years resolutions already being neglected (btw his formula calculates june 22 as the happiest day).

not my hood

turns out dr cliff was a few days late. it was early last week when the blues managed to interrupt my routine. i lacked energy and inspiration. i felt lonely and lame. figuring out why wasnt so tough. im friendless in suburban chicago, my lil niece has been out of the country for 3 wks, and ive continued my hobby of looking for love in all the wrong places.

given the evidence, im surprised that its taken this long for the doldrums to interrupt my daily grind. but ah ha! it turns out its the routine itself - cleverly filled with gobs of distractions - that keeps reality at bay. ive blocked my creative impulse with the familiar detritus of social websites, porn, npr and sim city, apparently preferring to 'keep busy' to the endorphin rush of discovering and doing new things. 'comfort' comes in many forms, i guess.

with this in mind and a swift spank for my so-far mediocre adherence to my new years resolutions, i have designated this week 'the week without distractions'. for the next 7 days i will try to spurn anything designed to dull the senses, thereby revealing the vivid life.

2007 all asia pass!

cathay pacific airlines has wasted no time to announce their 2007 all asia pass promotion! this is one of the best deals in the travel industry and having taken advantage of it last year, i *highly* recommend it to anyone who is looking to do some travel in asia this year.

for 2007, $1399 buys you access to any (or all) of 23 destinations originating in 3 us cities over a 21-day period:

you can add destinations in india, bangladesh, viet nam, australia or nz for another $300-550 each or extend your travel beyond 21 days for an additional $250-400. summer travel (may 18-aug 19) also incurs a $450 surcharge. note that most flights route through hong kong (a wonderful airport) and you must book your trip through a travel agent.

even tho its more expensive than last year, the added standard fare options of manila, phuket and phnom penh make it well worth it and where else can you travel from the states to multiple locations in asia for this cheap? lemme know if u need any help putting together your itinerary or connecting you with one of the few travel agents who are familiar with this promotion. cathay was voted #1 airline last year for good reason. traveling on a non-usa airline means good food, 1/2-full flights and courteous (and hot) flight attendants. now go plan your adventure!

technical: fotos up

greetings friends. even tho zorpia was free and started by a cute asian dude, i was wooed by flickrs yummy interface and have taken the past few days to migrate most of my photo albums over there. ive also uploaded a few new ones just for kicks. sucks i forgot about googles free picasa. lets hope i can control my undiagnosed ocd long enough to avoid migrating everything over there within the month. unlikely.
view all of my photos here.

resolved

my mother instilled a fair amount of superstition in me as a wee lad. shaking ones leg forfeits luck, the number 4 represents death and spitting after hearing the word 'monkey' improves your luck. her smorgasbord of beliefs came from korean and other asian traditions as well as just original inspiration from mamas noggin. oma also shared the widespread conviction that what transpires on new years day influences the rest of the year.

so i was happy to wake up on jan 1 2007 sans hangover, to spend my morning in good company, clean the house, go for a run, read my book and bathe myself- all good activities lest i want to spend the next 364 days sick, lonely, illiterate, fat and dirty. weeks earlier i wasnt looking forward to spending new years alone at home while family and friends partied it up in bangkok, la and providenciales. but as the date approached having solo time to reflect on 2006 and penning new years resolutions fireside were nice.

samchun+zuzu: together for the first time

in review 2006 was an outstanding year. it started out rough with my final 8 weeks at mavin, but in retrospect that yuck confirmed that leaving was a good thing and provided several vivid lessons that will remain in my life skills box longer than a sweet and sentimental goodbye would have. the following 10 months as a retiree were amazing. highlights include my 3-month asian holiday that has already joined the life highlights reel and spending time with baby, which has been mastercard priceless. perhaps most importantly has been kicking 8 years of constant colds. in 2006 i went 11 months without my infamous 'thousand year cough' and am no longer scurred that im carrying some undiagnosed/undiscovered strain of tuberculosis. i also did a lot more writing in 2006 and my less wounded responses to unflattering critiques means ive made progress on becoming more secure and mature.

im very excited for 2007. besides having an aesthetically pleasing, sleek look, 2007 will see the culmination (or continuation?) of my physical and occupational post-mavin transition. by years end i expect to be in korea and to have a short answer to the question, 'what do you do?'

lately ive found myself looking back with something just short of regret- lamenting the myriad occasions i did not make bolder actions earlier. unlike those 30-minute afternoon recesses in first grade that seemed to last forever, as i age time passes quickly and i take time (mine and others) less for granted. tho its easy to make excuses and be lazy, 365 days is so short as to inspire panic (or resignation) when making lifes plans so in 2007 i resolve to actively nuture two areas: education and interaction.

interaction
i admit to sometimes talking as a verbal alternative to breathing. instead this year i will participate in content-laden conversations filled with precisely chosen words, even when awkward pauses to locate the exact word makes me want to rush or abandon the process. and when the words arent flowing i want to reject the urge to congest contemplative silences with the white noise of chicago public radio, by incessantly logging onto social networking websites or by listening to the same 10 songs on my ipod. in 2007 i will also be more valuable to people by being a more generous listener and through more unconditional giving. on the weblog front although ive enjoyed interacting with folks on here i must identify a clearer purpose and a more integrated strategy for pop-id.

education
ive gone from getting my school districts highest test scores to being called a 'himbo' a coupla months back. i need to get more learned. to this end i will read lots and lots and keep writing in 2007. furthermore i will be more curious about learning how things like zinc gluconate and economies work instead of just accepting that they do, or improvising a less-efficient old skool solution when i dont feel like reading the manual. i will also finally learn to speak functional korean and continue my search for a spiritual home. hysterical homo-obsessed christianity is totally on the outs but exploring buddhisms desire and suffering cycle is intruiging.

humans need milestones and january 1 provides an institutional, collective one for much of the world. even so, the new year is also a very personal and private opportunity for reflection, analysis and goal setting. with big but realistic goals in place i feel ready for the hard but exhillarating steps to make them reality. happy new year everyone! xo