saigon samanthas homo hotspots

kris met hieu on a previous trip to saigon and returned the favor when hieu visited bangkok months later. hours after landing in viet nam, our local host met us and began several days of amazing eats and generous hospitality, southeast asian style.

our first stop was highlands coffee, a starbucks-inspired establishment in a country thats thwarted that beheamouths bid for total world domination. we ordered avocado shakes, viet iced coffee and pomelo juice while rotating ipods tuned to our favorite songs- nina simone, eva cassidy and thai singer kam tam ti tong tob. scanning the premises we saw the universal sign of a homo hotspot- smartly coifed young men vogueing and scanning the room for eye candy (takes one to know one). as we watched hieu wave and chat with most of the clientele, we giggled like school girls, honored that we were the guests of the unofficial mayor of homo chi minh city.

saigons underground community of 'bolos' (shorthand for bong lo or homosexuals) doesnt hold two snaps to other big asian cities. yet under the auspices of our seasoned sister, we penetrated the tunnels of viet nams rainbow underworld. case in point (and since we were always eating) was our exclusive meal at tuans, hcmcs only private restaurant (outside the hotels). owned by hieus gay friend, its small, tasteful, yellow-walled interiors were complemented by scurrying geckos and a large tree in the courtyard laden with football-sized jackfruit. it was here where i muched on some duck neck and started photographing urinals, the colorful fruity pebbles too irresistible to ignore. a centipede raced beneath the potty, which reminded me of the kuala lumpur rapid transit system. i keep forgetting what country im in. im becoming cuckoo.

from tuans we made way to samsara, hcmcs only gay club. hieu warned us that people would stare... and how! the response to our entry would put the imperial crier to shame. every head turned in our direction as fresh meat was delivered to a very rancid butchershop. that sounds horrible. what i mean is homo ho chi minh is small and incestuous and everyone knew we were newbies. the rest of the night was spent pretending to not be really weirded out by the brazen penetrating stares, the desperate longings of lonely aging men, and the shameless grabs and pokes by club princesses.

not that it was all bad. i sat in awe of the *entire* clubs impassioned sing-along to 'take me home,' fumbling alongside my viet brothers who sang confidently about west virginia and country mamas. plus, attention is often fun and viet nam is home to some very very pretty boys, collectively the best looking ive seen in asia so far.

hieus a looker himself, and his gym-buffed 5'11 presence is conspicuous among his typically shorter and svelt comardes. he is neither flamboyant nor passionate about lgbt issues, yet of all the asian queers ive met in asia, he is the only one out to his parents and i felt none of the awkwardness around being gay that radiates from virtually everyone else ive met to date. during a memorable conversation about why he remains single he noted his pirated collection of sex and the city dvds and his particular affection for samantha... without further delay, we introduce saigon samantha.

im almost giddy at the thought of living/working here for a time, tho the countrys stifling homo climate gives me pause. sure america hates homos, but except for a few pockets of persistent internalized homophobia, im out and proud back home and wouldnt take kindly to being shoved back into the closet. lots to mull over. meanwhile, i close with a snapshot of what is already an asian tour 2006 highlight:

on my final night in viet nam, the pretty saigon boys took me on their wild club hopping ride under the bright full moon of the mid-autumn festival. after 3 clubs and 1 pho break, the 10 of us distributed ourselves onto 4 motorbikes and did our final laps atop ho chi minh villes spectacularly empty streets at 4 am. as our sweat-drenched bodies became dry thanks to the delightful 40 mph rush of early morning air, hoots and hollers narrated a dangerous game of moped chicken while a hot potato exchange of cell phones, cameras and the occasional titty twisting raised the stakes. but as late friday yielded to early saturday our nightly hijinx came to an end. one by one each bike veered off the main drag, its passengers waving a carefree, understated goodbye. mine was last and i couldnt help feeling both fulfilled and a lil sad.

its both sad and ironically liberating that a conspicuous crew of young queers out on the town aroused no suspicion or harrassment since we were in a place where homosexuality is so repressed as to not exist. as always, its lifes pesky transitions that cause the greatest grief and glory.
more viet nam photos here.